PIANO
A piano from a distance
Playing a soothing requiem
The weeping of mourners
Echoing in each string
The bloodstained keys
By deepening grief stricken
By languid fingers struck
The horror draws near
Pupils dilate with fear
Capillaries to the surface come
Bloodshot my eyes become
Darkness cuddles me
In its cradle of shadows
And sings a lullaby to me
Of eternal elusive sleep
WORDLESS
Pictures of current days
Moments wrapped in solace-paper
Nothing they can actually say
They’ll sadly die sooner or later
Lips stitched up
Mouth frantically striving to open
Find a world to eat up
The only motive
Words trying to escape
Jumping into vacuum unbound
A fruitless attempt to describe
Ineffable obstacles to surmount
DEAD POETRY
One thousand mute stanzas shouting
Ears reading between the lines
The mysteries concealed revealed
Realization snowing, pouring down
Thrown into Earth been have I
Being a human being myself I found
To be finite I am compelled
Angst’s name I can’t pronounce
Nothingness encountered
Knowing not how to beat
Writing from dawn to dusk
Seeing my fatigued hand bleed
When I’m all gone
My legacy will I delegate
It is my last endeavour
To transcend this mortal fate
MOTHER
Breasts nursing immoderately
Lips sucking unrestrainedly
Excess of stimuli overloaded
Surfeit of pleasure creating
Psyche elaborating id
Two non-separate beings
Mother-son
Annihilating each other
Cannibalistic incest
Secondary violence spinning
Round and around my ego
Deciphering worlds
Decoding cries
All for my good
All for my well-being
Keeping me away
From experience I need
Producing livable fantasies
For her offspring
Mommy, do you love me?
Will you love me till it hurts?
Please, don’t let me breathe
MELANCHOLY
I see through windows the climate react
Flakes of snow try to survive fall in vain
Bewailing prisms the light trespass-diffract
For their fleeting lives they have lived in pain
Eyeless sorrows echoing in the taut air
Of agony screams sound in bereavement
For laments of life-death their days impair
Their souls alone search for hurt abatement
They try to find where meaning there is not
A reason that makes up for the suffering
But causes border the logical not
Their minds cannot achieve understanding
In their departure is left silence mere
For when death is there nothing dares draw near
DEATH II
Death spiraling up and down
The twisted roots of the tree of despondency
Swirling like a swarm of locusts
Across time and space
Inexorably erasing my will to live
Uninterruptedly making me die
Joy born, by and from, life
Is just a dread mask
To smother sorrow in non-realization
Turning life in a lengthy consolation
The ultimate aim of life is Death beyond Death
An aimless aim
MEMORIES
I’m so afraid
I’m forgetting everything
Every single bygone moment fades away
They are smashed against a mass of oblivion
There, they all shade off and confound
Just blurred images with no faces
I fail to remember
My face
My self
Where am I?
Past futile arcades
I pass them through
And none is retained
Like memorized useless data
They are shredded away
Is my past dying with me?
Is my unborn future dead already?
Does the abyss looks into me
As I look into it?
SELF-HARM
I’m not practicing for Hell
If you might be wondering
Simply
I’m learning how to die
Not to live, to die
Am I dead or alive right now?
I suppose the blade will tell me
Won’t it?
Don’t tell me things ok are gonna be
‘Cause that only a fucking cliché can be
I’m already forgetting how to feel
To refresh my memory I need a shake of thoughts
The razor will bring back what I thought lost
I’m not seeking for your attention
If you might be wondering
Simply
I need scars as reminders of who the fuck I am
Each perfect mark
An aide-mémoire of my innocence forlorn
They sink in my skin refusing to leave
As sanity afloat tries itself to keep
Mommy, am I still alive?
